Little Acts of Kindness

Ok, so I enjoy food.

(surprised? Probably not, but hey, it's all good)

And I have a friend that we like to get together and go to movies or dinner and just catch up.  We did that tonight, we went to Chili's for dinner, then decided randomly to go to Sammy's Cafe and get shakes.

Now if you don't know what Sammy's is, or have never been to a Sammy's I'm going to say that you desperately need to find the closest one to you and go.  NOW! Because their shakes are flipping amazing.  Especially their pie and cupcake shakes.  So, of course you can never say no to Sammy's shakes.  
Well, we ordered, actually, my friend ordered and paid and when it came my turn I ordered and handed the server my card and well, nothing happened. For some reason at that moment the internet died and was unable to connect to whatever source needed to run my card.  So, I patiently stood there waiting for them to fix the internet, and three staff members later, we were still unable to get it to work.

Naturally, I thought it was the Universe telling me two things.
1. It's nearly swim season Jenn, and you definitely don't need to eat your pumpkin pie cheesecake shake, especially since you are dying to lose that pooch
2. You really should save the 4.75 you are wanting to pay for that shake

Needless to say, I decided to ignore the universe and wait patiently for my shake, because hey, it's pumpkin pie. And I can't say no to pumpkin pie. 
So, while I was waiting I struck up a conversation with a guy standing behind me. Typical, awkward chit-chat, while we were waiting for the internet to work. 
And for several awkward minutes I waited for their internet to come up so I could pay and let the people behind me go and get their food as well. 
Time after time, they swiped my card, with no success.  And I was getting ready to just say "bag it" and take the Universe for it's word.  Then the guy behind me stepped up to the counter and said:
"Just let me pay for her's as well as mine, that way she can get her shake."
I insisted that it wasn't necessary, but he insisted saying : "I remember what it was like to be a student, with no money, it's fine."
I decided to let him be a gentleman and not argue with him.  And in return, the guy behind the counter gave him a discount.

Now, it's possible, that the guy just wanted me out of the way so that he and his friends could get their food and get the line moving again.  And it's possible that the guy behind the counter gave him the discount because he felt bad for him standing there for so long.
But who wants to look at the glass half-empty when someone willingly paid for my shake.  Especially since it wasn't his responsibility, and he easily could have just went ahead and just pushed ahead of me. I would have let him do that, because I felt bad for holding up the line. 

It's those little acts of kindness that make life worth living, that make a persons day and make us feel like there is still some good in the world.  Especially with all the ugly that surrounds us, the selfishness, the rudeness, the unfairness, it's easy to let it get you down. 

So, let's all try to make someone's day today, you don't know what you could do, and hey, they could even decide to pay it forward themselves.  It could be a great chain that keeps going, just because of your simple act of kindness.  I know I'm going to do it, because I remember how I felt and i would love to make someone's day just because I decided to be kind.

ASL rocks!!

So, when I'm bored I translate music into ASL and then video myself and post them to YouTube.
(bigheaded? maybe, but it's fun for me) So, I wanted to post them on here for those of you who read this blog,
(stuck on myself much? possibly.)
Anyway, I hope you enjoy them. Also I encourage you all to learn some sign language if you enjoy them. Mainly because ASL is a great language and the deaf really love it (generally) when we know some signs.
Here you go:

I can only Imagine by Mercy Me
Two Black Cadillacs by Carrie Underwood
No by Cherie Call
I dreamed a dream from Les Miserables

I have one more on YouTube as well, but I can't get it to attach on here. So if you really want to watch it it's Call me Maybe by Carly Rae Jepson.  :) Thanks all, and enjoy!

Tips to improve your dining experience from the perspective of your server

 Ok all,

I just have to put up a post of common logic that should be used when you go to a restaurant.  Working in the dining service industry you see a lot of obnoxious and rude things, along with a lot of mishaps.  Here's a few tips I'd give to you all because frankly, it can be annoying to the business.

1. Read the Menu: This seems like a fairly logical one, but for a lot of the customers I run into on a daily basis, most don't and then the company is faced with the burden of taking care of YOUR mistake. Yes, they are willing to do it, but they are losing money when they do.  And in this economy, it's not entirely fair to put the burden of blame on them.
           *If you have a question about an item you want to order, please ask. Most staff should be                 knowledgeable about the menu and should be able to easily answer your questions.

2. Be kind to the server:  I've worked in dining services that range from full service to food court settings, and I'll tell you A LOT of gossip and mud slinging about customers happens behind the scenes.  But it's more likely to happen if you get ornery at the server.  Remember, they are just doing their job.  If they've done a lousy job, then you have every right to be upset.  But more often than not, they are normal people trying their best to do a good job.  Do that, and you will probably get better service and a more willing server.

3. Listen to the server when they speak to you: I currently work in a fast-causal dining environment where the customer orders up front and then takes a seat and the food is brought to them. Similar to Kneaders or Zupa's.  And I can tell you, one of the number one causes of messed up orders is neither party listening to each other.  A lot of my customers will rattle off what they want then walk off because someone else is paying or they will half-listen to me when I try to read back the order.  PEOPLE! If the server reads back the order it's because they don't want to mess it up.  Pay attention and be helpful because that is the key to making sure that you get exactly what you would like.
              * The term the customer is always right can be frustrating in a situation like this.  You have a right to get the food you want, but if you fail to pay attention. Please don't act like a jerk, sometimes it is your fault and it also makes the staff want to be less helpful if you're rude.  Remember, they're not paid enough to do what they do, so please be fair.

4. Don't get ornery if your server approaches your table and asks a question:  Sure, it's kind of annoying to have your conversation put on hold for a few seconds. Especially if you were onto something good, or if you're talking about something private.  But the server doesn't know that and they are there to make sure you are taken care of.  And if that means clearing your dishes, then that is the best they can do to make you more comfortable.  Take a few seconds to listen and talk to the server because if you don't want them to take your plate, they need to know.

5.  Be kind when questions are asked:  I know that "Do you want a recommendation from the menu?"  or the server talking over the menu quickly with you if you haven't been to the restaurant before can get a little annoying.  But once again, remember they're doing their job, and awkward body language from you makes it difficult to do that.  When I worked at a full service restaurant, part of the "routine" was to describe two meals from the menu, I could seriously get in trouble if I didn't, because the goal is to make money and sell food. (Sorry if that burst your bubble in any way) And I can tell you that I can't keep on one hand how many times I've gotten the annoyance look or the glares because they don't want to hear it.  And what makes it more frustrating, is when I could have cleared up questions the first time and they are later asked because you refused to listen to what I had to say.  Sorry, but that is frustrating for the server and makes you run the risk of being part of the gossip circle in the back room.

6. A smile or a thank you can make a difference:  Most servers are students just trying to survive, they're worn out and tired, yet they are there, missing dates, movies, and other activities to make sure you are being taken care of when you go and eat.  Take the time to show some appreciation.  A thank you, a smile or some form of gratitude can change the server's day.  Especially if they were really wanting to go to the movies with their roommates and instead are working on a Saturday night.  Remember, sometimes people are put to work so you can have a good time. Yes, they're willing to do it, but the gratitude can do wonders for your service.

7. Don't let your bad attitude/day be taken out on the server:  Unless you have a Seriously Real Reason to get angry at your server, don't do it.  Once again, they aren't generally paid a lot and they are there working hard to make sure you're taken care of.  They have lives too, boyfriends, drama, homework, and they don't need more stress than necessary.  If you are ornery or demanding to the point you are a serious pain in the butt.  This is probably the Number one thing that will get the mud flying in the back.  Food service is a stressful job and they are trying their best.  Being a pain will only frustrate your server and might cause them to give  bad service because they want you gone.  Sorry, but true.

8. 90-95% of the time, it's not the server's fault:  Everyone makes mistakes, it's what makes us human. But the most frustrating thing is when the server gets the blame when it wasn't their fault for the mess up.  A large majority of the time it is something else.  Largely, it can be the cook's fault (I'm not trying to pass the blame unfairly, but it's true) for whatever reason. They made the food wrong, added a side you didn't want etc.  One time I took the fall for the cooks not replacing the paper in the kitchen printer and my order got lost in limbo.  And even after they replaced it, the order didn't come through and I had no clue until 20 minutes later when I went to get the food and it wasn't there.   And the table got angry at me, and it was frustrating.  Try to remember that honestly sometimes there could be another factor to why something has messed up, and try to be understanding. Please.

9. Be honest with the server: If a problem arises and the server asks what they can do to remedy it, be honest.  If you seriously don't feel like you need to be reimbursed or something, let them know that and let it go.  Don't stew over it then complain to someone later.  I once had a situation where some food came out cold and I offered to fix the problem.  I was told many times that it was ok, and then later the person who told me that went and complained to my manager that I had been the one to try and fix the problem.  My manager had been really busy that evening and hadn't had time to talk with the table and gave me specific instructions to take care of it, which I tried to do.  Also, if you don't like what you ordered, that's fine, tell us and we'll take care of you.
                   *Not to mention, a free dessert is never bad.

10.  Be patient with the business if the restaurant is busy:  I run into so many grumpy people when we are the busiest.  And it can be very stressful because there's a million things that need to be done, and frankly, we are trying our best to take care of everyone.  Also, don't approach your server while they are doing something else and ask them to do another task.  90% of the time, it's going to be forgotten.  If they approach your table to bring your food, or to clear dishes etc.  That is the best time to ask a question, because they can make sure it gets taken care of instantly because they are finishing a task. Or they will make sure that someone else gets it done for you.

11. If the sign is not lit up, that means they're closed - that is fairly self explanatory.  And don't get upset if it doesn't fit into your schedule. You're not really fitting into theirs either and they REALLY would like to go home at the end of the day.


They probably seem very similar, but I promise, if you use some of these things you will most likely get better service and a nicer staff.  They are willing to take care of you, you need to be kind and approachable.
The customer is always right, but that doesn't mean you need to act like a jerk.

Breathtaking

So, yesterday was P-day for my missionary.
For those of you who don't know what that means it's kind of their day off. P=Preparation, so on that day they can write friends and family and they can e-mail as well. 
Trent and I had our usual e-mail session which actually was cut short. I honestly believe it's because he had nothing better to say.  And as usual I had been profusely apologizing for something I'd said in last weeks letter.  To which he once again replied that I didn't need to apologize, because it was completely fine. K, fine.

I went through the rest of my day, and it was great, I worked out some stuff with my degree, finished a paper that was two weeks late as it is.  Had a nice final class for one of my classes.   Then we got out early and I came home and then went to a ward activity since it was our closing social and, frankly, I haven't had the time to go and I thought I should say goodbye to this ward and make some final happy memories.

(We went roller skating btw, and I felt, quite a bit. But it was fun.)

Anyway, got home and was surprised to find another e-mail from Trent. The reason being he had access to a computer because he's spending this week at the office.  So, he had permission to get back on, and he didn't say much.  But the last thing he did say made my heart skip a beat.  This is what he said:

"Did you know you're so beautiful it takes my breath away?"

Naturally I was flattered, and then thankful that i have such a kind boy.  But when I woke up this morning the thought hit me.
Am I seriously so stunningly beautiful that I can make Trent breathless?

My first reaction was to tell myself that was how Trent is, but as I thought about it it occurred to me that all women are beautiful in their own way, and stunning in their own way.  And there is one person who will catch their breath while looking at us.  We don't need to be a Kiera Knightly  or [place name of most beautiful actress from your perspective here]  because, well they have makeup artists. And most of the time they are fake individuals as it is.

Trent helped me to figure out I was truly beautiful.  And beauty truly is in the eye of the beholder.  We can easily find some type of fault with ourselves.  For me, I could always afford to lose a few pounds, and get into shape.  But Trent hasn't cared about what jean size I wear, because he sees me as who I truly am.  And the right man in your life will remind you of that.  It's our job to believe it, even if we don't have someone right now, it is possible to see yourself as you truly are, and that is beautiful.

As I was writing this, I thought of this video I saw this morning on a friend's blog, and I feel like it applies to the term Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and it was a good reminder to me that while we're all different, we're all so beautiful.  Please watch.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=litXW91UauE&feature=player_embedded

Wasn't that amazing? So let's make a goal to being the stunning and breathtaking women we are.

That lost feeling

Hey everyone,
So, naturally I've slacked off again and so tonight I have decided to write about what ails me.

(As if I don't do that enough right? haha)

Anyway, as I may have stated earlier in this blog, I was diagnosed with Depression in early January, and with that comes some slight anxiety and paranoia.  It sucks, it truly does, and I felt like I could fight back with a metal bat or something.

But this stuff doesn't go away overnight.  There is a very definite healing process that needs to take place, and often it'll take longer than we would prefer.  Sure, fighting back is good, at least it has been in my situation because it's a start to get a handle on everything.  But the thing for me about fighting it, is that I'm not accepting the problem, just ignoring it and hiding it.  And sometimes, you need to take it on in a different fashion to the point where you have to let it permeate you again, so that you can kill it with kindness so to speak.

I've still yet to learn this lesson.

The best way I can describe it to my readers is like taking a pop bottle, and shaking it up, shaking, shaking and shaking until the pressure in the bottle is so much more than it can take.  And then the cap comes off, or it just eventually explodes.  Unfortunately, that's how I deal with my problems.  I bottle them up, and try to tell myself that the shaking of life around me isn't affecting me as much as it truly is.  Then something happens, and that cap comes off, and I end up being so much more depressed, so much more self conscious, and I always feel so lost and dark inside.  Unfortunately it's also during those times that I feel hopelessly worthless and lost.

And as a member of the LDS Church, I know the truth of both those things.  I'm a daughter of God, and I have never been, nor will I ever be worthless in His eyes.  And in the end, it's how He thinks of us and how we see ourselves that matters.  Not anyone else can tell us otherwise.  As for the lost feeling, I know where I can turn to, but sometimes, it's hard to remember those things because, come on, we all like to try and fix things ourselves right?




I thought the same thing when I was in debt a month ago, I can do it, I'll be alright.  Then my parents got a notification from the bank that I was late on payments and well, there was no more hiding it to myself convincing myself that it'll be ok.   Because it never will.  And honestly, if we are willing to be honest with ourselves and with God, (and our parents as well) that is always such a huge burden that can be taken off of your shoulders.  It may not magically fix the problem, but you have people that are there beside you to help you through it.   And with my  being in debt situation, it was good knowing that my parents knew because they were pushing me to take care of it before it became too bad and out of control.

In the end, we all will go through times where we feel lost, but if we turn to our Heavenly Father and rely on Christ's Atoning Sacrifice, we don't have to be completely lost.  Sure, there will be times in life that may seem dark, but with them we can survive and we can make it though while learning what we need to learn. 

I love my religion, and I love my Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ, with them all things are possible, and with them I can succeed at all things.  I am so thankful that I don't have to live my life in a continuous feeling of loss wandering from place to place.  And that means that I know in my heart that this lost feeling wont last forever, which makes it so much easier to go from day to day until it becomes easier because we've successfully made it out of the fog that life gives us.