Thursday, July 25, 2013

Our story - once again + 10 months down with an update!

Hey everyone:
So I know that I posted this story at the beginning, but I liked the way I worded this when I wrote my spotlight for a missionary girlfriend blog so I thought I'd share it.  :)  If you want to compare the two stories, they kind of come together. :)
I initially met Trenton Wayne Chaney in July of 2011 through my now brother-in-law Scott.  Trent is from Athens Ohio (in the Columbus Ohio Mission) and that's where Scott had served a full-time mission.  Trent and Scott met just days before he came home from his mission, but they hit it off and Scott gave him his contact information for when he was at home in Utah.  Well, Trent started driving Semi-trucks across the country and by sheer happenstance had mechanical problems just north of Salt Lake and had to stop to get repairs.  Knowing he would be there over the weekend he contacted Scott and asked if he could attend church with him.  So, they spent sunday together, then Trent got hauled over to my parents home because (naturally) Scott and my sister Natalie were unseperable.  That's how we first met, with Trent sitting on my parent's couch as I walked in from Church myself.   Now, according to Trent when he first saw me it was like in the movies, you know when the heroine walks in with her hair blowing in the wind, lights, angels singing, the whole shebang.   Now, I don't remember it being that dramatic of a first meeting, but he could swear that's how it went.  Then my boyfriend walked in behind me and he became a little deflated.  Needless to say, I still thought he was attractive and while we didn't talk much we did keep catching ourselves staring at each other from across the room.  Looking back, I desperately wanted Tyler (my boyfriend) to go home so I could get to know him better.  That sadly didn't happen because we left a few minutes later to have dinner with Tyler's family.   
So, we went our separate ways, and he tried to find me on facebook but later gave up because he couldn't find me (I didn't have an account at the time).  So, we forgot about each other, he continued to drive Truck and I moved back to Provo Utah to go to school.  Tyler and I ended things because, well I was moving and he also was preparing for a mission and I told him I wasn't going to wait for him. Ironic how that turned out huh?
Fast forward 6 months from our first meeting and I got a friend request from him.  I had forgotten about him, but knowing he was Scott's friend made me accept the request, and that was about it.  Aside from him liking an occasional photo or post we had little contact until April 24, 2012 when he messaged me on facebook informing me that he had a long train ride ahead of him and he was bored, SO I could text him if I wanted.  Being in a good mood, I did and that was the beginning of our relationship.
We started texting and talking on the phone constantly for about three weeks and during that time I developed the HUGEST crush on him and I realized that I really wanted to pursue a relationship with him. Yet, I was afraid because I had been hurt so many times in the past, but as I prayed about it I felt nothing but peace and I knew that I could trust him. After three weeks we both shared our pasts with each other.  He later told me that was the night he knew I would be his wife and that he wanted to marry me, because of how strong I was.  About a week after that we admitted to having deeper feelings for each other than we thought and so, he decided to fly to utah to visit me.  And he did on June 8th of 2012, that was also the day we became an official couple.  As we spent the weekend together we fell even more for each other (and I'll tell you, that guy knows how to kiss me so that I'll melt into his arms.).  And after he flew back our relationship continued, and this time I felt like a piece of me was missing (well, halfway across the country).
When we first started talking I had known that Trent had a desire to serve a mission.  And I was eager to support him.  I guess one of the main reasons was that he is an older missionary.  He joined the church at 22, and he left soon after he turned 24.  I loved how excited he was about it, and in my heart something told me I needed to wait for him, whether that be unofficially or officially.  Luckily he asked me to wait for him as his girlfriend shortly before he received his call.
I was lucky enough to be able to be there when he received his call and was the only one beside him when he opened it.  He was called to serve in the San Fernando California mission.  That was the day it hit me that he would actually be leaving me for two years, but at the same time I was excited to be by his side for this 24 month adventure.
   Saying goodbye was the hardest thing I ever did though. He left September 26th 2012, and I was able to spend the four days before he left with him.  During that time, he gave me a promise ring and we talked about how we wanted everything to go.  The one conclusion we came to is that we truly did love each other and we wanted things to work out when he came home.  We both knew that the two years would be rough at times and it could put a strain on our relationship, but we knew that if we made it through this and still want to be together that we could probably do anything.  Right before we said goodbye, we went into my room to spend the last few minutes alone and we said one last prayer together and then cried together.  The last thing he said to me was "I'll see you in two years Bubbles.  We can do this because Two years is nothing compared to the eternities we'll share together." (bubbles is my nickname. Long story there, message me if you want to hear it)
   So, he left.  Luckily, I had 18 credits and a 20 hour a week job to keep me distracted and the months have just flown by.  We are a little past 9 months and I cannot believe how fast the time has gone.  Sure, 15 months is still quite a long time but even though I have my days where I doubt and wonder why I'm doing this, I know in my heart I love him and I choose him.   
The mission though allows us both to get to know each other better as well as not rush things too much.  If he hadn't left on his mission we would most definitely be married by now, no doubt about it.  But we both know that our Heavenly Father has played a role in bringing us together, because there is just too much coincidence for Him not to have a hand in it.  
The past 9 months though I feel has allowed our relationship to grow stronger and deeper.  He is doing so well on his mission and I couldn't be more proud of him.  
As for the future, the next year should see me graduated with my Bachelors Degree in Deaf Studies, and I'll hopefully be immersed into my career by the time September 24, 2014 rolls around.  I'm not sure how long we want to wait before we get engaged, but I know I'm not going to push him because he might need time to get settled back into normal life before we tie the knot.  His plans as of right now are to come home and start his trucking company, as soon as that gets running as smoothly as possible he'll head back to school and get his Bachelors then it's off to Law School for him.  So, I have a few more years of supporting him and being patient while he gets everything settled to support our family. I eventually want to retire and be a stay at home mother.  He knows this is my ultimate goal and dream and he supports me wholeheartedly.  In fact, that is what we seem to do is support each other and encourage the other to pursue their dreams and goals.  
Other than that, the future is still a bit of a mystery to me, and while it does make me nervous, it does make me excited.  I do hope that things work out between Trenton and myself, and I feel like it will if I make that my decision and path to pursue.  But, I'll continue to leave it up to the Lord and let Him lead, bless and guide me through the rest of this journey.  I know I'm waiting for a reason, and the things Trent and I are both going to learn will help us with our future family."
"In regards to the waiting:
    I've found that it's more a time for me to figure out who I am and to progress and try to reach my true potential as a daughter of God and a future wife and mother.  My main goal aside from completing School while Trent is gone is to be ready to make the covenants with my Heavenly Father in the Temple and receive my endowments one day.  I will admit that while I seem all positive about this, I do have my hard days.  I struggle with depression, primarily seasonal, and I feel the pangs of loneliness just like any other MG does.  The thing I've come to realize is that the Adversary plays a dirty game of hardball and he will come after you and your missionary, the goal then is to fight back and develop a close relationship with our Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ.  Christ's atonement is a wonderful gift we've all been given and we as MG's have the opportunity to use it while we wait for our boys.  It has a comforting power that is so beautiful and freely given to any and all who partake of what's offered.  So girls, stay close to our Savior, feast upon the scriptures, and whatever you do don't let Satan get you down.  He knows he's going to lose in the end and so it is his goal to make us all miserable like himself, and we can't let him have that satisfaction of winning.  
Lastly, don't put yourself in a box and hide away for two years.  Enjoy life, make friends, develop hobbies, volunteer, try to finish school, you WILL NOT regret the time you take for yourself.  And your missionary wont regret it either I can assure you,  and in the end it will only make us better women and potential wives and mothers.  We can do this ladies, and with Heavenly Father and Christ on your side I promise that ANYTHING is possible."
UPDATE:
   10 glorious months have finally passed us by as you can see by my picture here
             
Sidewalk chalk is SO FUN to play with. I'd totally forgotten.

Anyway, I'm getting closer every day to that year mark.  I still miss him a lot, but I'm so thankful for everyday I have to learn how to become better, and figure out who I am so that by the time he comes home I'm the woman he deserves as a wife.
He's also been district leader for a total of two transfers.  I was so proud when he e-mailed me and said that he was going to be a DL.  Through most of his mission he's told me how much he wants to be a leader.  On top of DL, he was also a trainer for not one but TWO missionaries.  One of which is waiting for his visa to Brazil. :)  Yet, he has never failed to make sure I've been paid attention too.  I've continued to get a letter every week from him. Sure, they might not be as long and detailed, but it's nice to get them.

Here's some pictures:
The top one is the line of paternity is what he called it.  It's kind of a who trained who type of thing.  The two in the bottom right corner are the boys Trent has been training
The second is a picture from his district.  And the John Deere hat? Yes, that's most definitely him, his dream is to own his own ranch one day. :)


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